Hype on a Plane

Well, so much for that.

The riotously hyped “Snakes on a Plane� essentially crash-landed over the weekend: The venomous vipers at boxofficemojo.com declined to even grant it the No. 1 position on the chart, declining to count its $1.5 million gross on Thursday evening as part of its weekend take.

Boxofficeguru.com was a little more magnanimous, giving it the coveted No. 1 slot for its $15.3 gross, ahead of “Talledega Nights�’ $14.1 million. Still, that was almost half of the $28 million the website forecast the film to earn over the weekend, and the guru couldn’t resist adding a little insult to injury: “Of the 62 films in history that have opened in 3,500 or more theaters, 61 have grossed more than 'Snakes' on opening weekend,� it reported.

Which just goes to show that the Internets are good for at least one thing: Obfuscating the degree of actual interest in any given subject under a mountain of hype. In other words, one guy’s private obsession with getting invited to a movie premiere does not a movement make.

There’s one benefit of this anemic turnout: It’ll be that much sooner that we’re spared everyone citing that #@+#@&$%*$ line from the movie.